Wednesday, 30 October 2013

Exciting New Press Controls

At last ! The old Press Standards Board is going to be replaced with a new Royal Charter, so that our corrupt politicians can tell our unscrupulous journalists what not to write.
The new system will consist of voluntary ethical standards for editors to embrace out of the goodness of their hearts, and will be adopted by nobody, enforced by no particular means and will certainly not infringe that sacred liberty of the media to snoop, steal, and slander with impunity as they have always done before. There will be a carrot that nobody wants and a stick that nobody uses, which will ensure that newspapers and websites can go on eavesdropping and publishing brazen lies.
And this is despite the fact that the EU is secretly pouring millions of pounds of our money into supporting lobby groups that want to censor the press. Don't worry, they won't censor anything really malicious or libellous  - just offensive stuff, you know, telling us to leave the EU and that sort of thing.
We can't have that!

Tuesday, 29 October 2013

Sorry, but the Flu Jab CAN Give You Flu.

The NHS is bombarding us with its annual campaign to get us all to have a 'flu jab and circulating leaflets that insist "the 'flu jab CANNOT give you 'flu". Oh, yes it can!
I know, the injection contains a dead virus. But regardless of what it contains, it can and DOES give many people 'flu.
When I had it, administered by my local GP's surgery in Oxford, the first thing it did was make my arm swell up and go hard in reaction. It was quite painful. Then I started to feel sniffy and shivery. Within five days of having the injection I developed the worst 'flu I have ever experienced. I don't mean just a rotten cold with a sore throat and a bit of mugginess - it was far worse. I had an absolute raging fever, with a temperature of at least 104F, and I had to resort to every form of medication available without prescription. I was wiped out for at least a week. When I tottered back to my feet and eventually went to complain to the doctors, of course they told me it was a coincidence, but I've never had a flu jab since.
      And I regularly come across other people who have had the very same experience. They get the flu jab, and then they immediately get severe 'flu. One of those people is an eighty-five year old woman who happens to be my mother, which makes me wonder if there is a hereditary factor in this. You won't find her complaining about anything without real cause.  There never was a tougher, more stoic, spartan-minded, we-had-it-worse-in-the-war sort of person than her  - and if she says it was bad, you know it was really ghastly.

Monday, 28 October 2013

Ring-Fencing Foreign Aid - to build Palaces

The UK gives £19 million per year in foreign aid to South Africa, and meanwhile the President of South Africa is spending what is estimated to be between 14 and 17  £ million on building himself a vast, luxury dwelling.

Not quite right...South African president Jacob Zuma continues to have a lavish lifestyle despite many parts of his country struggling for survival

And in case you are about to say "Anybody who believes the Daily Mail is a bigot", here is what the Independent reports about it...
"A helipad with an underground tunnel linking it to the main residence; his and hers bathrooms and 10 houses for security guards are among recent upgrades to South African President Jacob Zuma's rural homestead. The Nkandla residence, in one of the poorest areas of the country, will soon have a playground, a visitors' centre and a bunker reached by twin elevators.

The bill runs to at least $23m (£14m) in taxpayers' money. Questions over the lavish spending in KwaZulu Natal province come as Mr Zuma faces a fight for his political life and widespread unrest over corruption in the ruling African National Congress (ANC).
The President's aides have responded to questions over the cost of the project, dubbed "Zumaville" in the local media, by insisting that his family was paying for the bulk of costs. However, documents leaked to the City Press newspaper show that the public purse is covering 95 per cent.
When questioned by reporters this week, Mr Zuma insisted he was unaware of how much the upgrade was costing and referred queries to the Minister of Public Works. The minister said the newspaper that printed the documents should be prosecuted for revealing "state secrets".
Zumaville presents an uncomfortable contrast with the rest of Nkandla – one of the five poorest areas in KwaZulu Natal, with unemployment at 90 per cent.
The 70-year-old leader has been accused of being out of touch with ordinary South Africans and was criticised as "aloof" for his recent handling of the police killings of 34 striking platinum miners in Marikana. Wildcat strikes continue across the country, with the former ANC Youth League leader, Julius Malema, calling for mines to be nationalised and Mr Zuma to be ousted.
Mr Zuma, who took power by toppling Thabo Mbeki four years ago, is expected to face a challenge from his Vice President, Kgalema Mothlanthe, at a party congress in December.
The President has been dogged by corruption charges throughout his political career. The money to purchase the Nkandla residence reportedly came from his business partner, Schabir Shaik, who was convicted of corruption and fraud in a case linked to a controversial arms deal. Mr Zuma, who was Vice President at the time, escaped related charges after taking the top office.
Since then, Mr Zuma and the ANC have been accused of escalating corruption. Mr Malema, who helped oust Mr Mbeki while a Zuma supporter, faces allegations of fraud. A small circle of ANC-linked black businessmen have amassed vast fortunes, with Cyril Ramaphosa – once a leadership contender – recently criticised for spending millions of dollars on a prize bull.
A rash of political murders has been blamed on local officials turning on each other in a scramble for money and patronage. In Mr Zuma's home province, 38 ANC members have been killed since February last year."

Sunday, 27 October 2013

Mad Clegg Demands We Give Even More Money to the EU

The brainless imbecile Nick Clegg has called for an increase in our financial contribution to the European Black Hole, yes an increase. The maniac wants to give them even more of our money.
This country already has debts of over £1 trillion.
Every day we give £55 million to the EU, and every year we are asked to make colossal extra payments, twelve billion here and fifteen billion there, to bail out the debt-ridden sinking economies of the eurozone. Meanwhile we are pushing handicapped people out of their homes in the UK to save £12 per week in benefits... and we call this "austerity".
       The EU makes us pay onerous green taxes and obscene amounts of money for pointless regulation and bureaucracy. It charges us for landfill if we put our waste into our own ground and if we burn it, it charges us for CO2 emissions.

Embarrassing: Nick Clegg, pictured on ITV Daybreak, claimed credit for the budget cut, which his own MEPs have voted to reverse

Now Clegg and his Libdem cretins have voted to up the amount we hand over to the greedy Brussels bureaucracy.  He backed an increase in the spending of the EU, which pays him a lavish lifetime's salary so long as he remains loyal to it and never criticizes its policies or agenda. Nobody here voted for it so we know it is "liberal" and "democratic".
When Clegg came to power, it was on student votes, bought with his promise to abolish university tuition fees. Within hours of coming to power, he let the Conservatives raise them to £9,000 per year. The rumour now in university circles is that fees will soon have to go up to £16,000 per year to keep the universities open and compensate for ever-meaner government cuts. Students will leave university with a total debt of around £60,000...if they decide to go there at all, which many will not.
    The EU administrators have built themselves luxury new offices and a wonderful museum of "European history" with the money they snatch from us.
    Just how mad are the Libdems?
Libdem veteran Vince Cable sold off the Royal Mail for £3 billion despite it being valued at £10 billion. The banking concern that has bought a lion's share, J.P. Morgan, has just been convicted of crooked business practices and will be paying a massive fine. Luckily the Royal Mail profits will enable them to find the cash!
In Wales, Libdem town councillor John Larsen took up arson and bomb-making as his hobby. After causing a series of explosions that destroyed buildings and vehicles in Denbigh, the ex-mayor was finally convicted this year of possessing high explosives and has been sent to gaol.

Larsen said that doing this gave him a "thrill". Here are some of his toys: -

Fuse wire and component parts

Libdem loonies come in every shape and form.
Libdem MEP Catherine Bearder tells me that it is "equality" to give more money to one group of people than to any others. Why? Because that's equality, according to her. When asked how much funding the EU was giving to the ridiculous "Gay games" in Paris, she responded that she didn't know but that she supported it anyway, as it is "fair" for homosexuals to be able to compete in the normal Olympics and all other athletics events while at the same time claiming EXTRA money for separate events... as if they were excluded.
If you or I want extra money, that is "unfair". If homosexuals want extra money that is "equality". Got it?

Remember when you come to vote:
Libdems are stupid.
Libdems are dishonest.
Libdems are just as bad as Labour but they pretend to be different.
Libdems are simply not necessary...

Thursday, 24 October 2013

Arab Spring - oh really?

Mariam, an 8 year- old Coptic Christian girl, was hit by 13 bullets while she was standing in front of the Church of the Virgin Mary in Cairo after attending a wedding last Sunday.
Two masked Islamic gunmen on a motorbike opened fire on the Virgin Mary Church in Warraq district in the Egyptian capital.
More than 60 churches have been attacked and burnt since the Islamist president Mohamed Morsi was ousted after a massive petition called for him to step down.
The Muslim Brotherhood is now targeting Coptic Christian en masse. they have also attacked some moderate muslims who participated in the revolt against President Morsi, army personnel and the police force.

Philopatir, 3 years old, is Mariam's brother. He was also wounded in the terrorist attack on the Virgin Mary Church along with his mother and grandmother. All were injured. He is still under treatment for his gunshot wound in the abdomen.

Wednesday, 16 October 2013

And now - the USA Wedding Tax

       Cameron's government has insulted married people by offering them a measly couple of hundred pounds per year in tax allowance, and has been pounced on immediately by the Libdems for unfairness to those who are unmarried. It's still true that if you want to get married, you have to foot a huge bill yourself and then subsidize other lifestyles through your taxes.
       Meanwhile over the pond in America President Obama has introduced a hefty Marriage Tax, under the guise of Obamacare. Those who have scrutinized the details of his new health care plan say that it will cost you more if you are married than if you cohabit yet stay single  - in fact, if you are married, and get divorced, you will save thousands of dollars annually under the new system. No wonder they call it O'Barmy-care.

Save Money on Obamacare — Get Divorced
It's being called Obamacare's "wedding tax." Provisions of the healthcare reform bill discourage marriage — and encourage divorce.
According to a report by PJ Media, married couples can save thousands of dollars on healthcare premiums if they get a divorce and continue to live together.
That's because Obamacare is designed to provide healthcare benefits that are substantially more generous for lower-income people, and the bill counts a married couple's income jointly.
Using a calculator from the Kaiser Family Foundation, PJ Media's Tom Blumer gave the example of a 60-year-old married couple with no children in the household, with identical annual incomes totaling $62,041. Obamacare premiums rise sharply when combined earnings hit $62,041.
If they remain wed, their net premium next year would be $16,382. But unmarried individuals can earn up to $45,960 before losing Obamacare's subsidies, so if the couple divorces and each reports an income of $31,020.50, their combined net premium would be $5,354. That's a savings of $11,028 next year.
Blumer also offers the example of a 40-year-old couple with two children and incomes of $70,000 and $23,000.
Their combined income is $93,000, and subsidies disappear at $92,401 for married pairs with two children. Their combined premium would be $11,547 next year.
But if they divorce and give custody of the children to the lower-earning spouse, one spouse's premium would be $3,857 and the other's would be $460, for a total of $4,317. That's a savings of $7,230 next year.
Blumer observes: "Clearly, many couples who are considering marriage, especially after several years of seeing formerly married couples regress to cohabiting, will look at Obamacare's 'wedding tax' and say, 'never mind.'
"The effect on society will be incalculable, and certainly not for the good."
However, the law in many states says a couple cannot cohabit indefinitely and still claim not to be married.
The IRS could find those couples who are claiming they are not wed for healthcare subsidy purposes, leading to this scenario, according to Blumer: "Those caught and punished by the IRS carrying out its new role as the de facto 'marriage police' could get hit with multi-year bills for undeserved 'tax credits' running into tens of thousands of dollars."

Sunday, 13 October 2013

Make October 11th a Holiday Throughout Europe

We really should make October 11th a public holiday throughout Europe. Why? Because it is the anniversary of the Battle of Tours, the great victory of Charles, King of the Franks, against the invading hordes of the Saracen army. The battle took place in the year 732. Ever afterwards Charles was known as "Charles Martel"  - Charles the Hammer.

 The Saracens were Muslim jihadists from Arabia. In one century they had overrun most of Asia Minor, North Africa and Spain, before heading over the Pyrenees into what is now France. They had beseiged Constantinople. They burned, looted, raped and pillaged everywhere, desecrating churches and proclaiming they had come to impose the rule of Mahomet.
 The Franks were greatly outnumbered but they were on home ground at Tours, near the river Loire, and they fought a long tough battle of attrition, holding out for seven days against repeated assaults." “Near the river Owar [Loire], the two great hosts of the two languages and the two creeds [Islam and Christianity] were set in array against each other. The hearts of Abd al-Rahman, his captains and his men were filled with wrath and pride, and they were the first to begin to fight. The Muslim horsemen dashed fierce and frequent forward against the battalions of the Franks, who resisted manfully, and many fell dead on either side, until the going down of the sun.”
According to the Chronicle of 754, much of which was composed from eye-witness accounts, “The men of the north stood as motionless as a wall, they were like a belt of ice frozen together, and not to be dissolved, as they slew the Arab with the sword. The Austrasians [Franks], vast of limb, and iron of hand, hewed on bravely in the thick of the fight; it was they who found and cut down the Saracen’s king [Rahman].”

The battle was a turning-point in European history. If King Charles and his small army had not defeated the invaders, Islam might have established itself all over Europe. Instead, King Charles founded a great dynasty, and became the grandfather of Charlemagne.
   Can we even envisage Europe if Charles and his sturdy troops had lost the battle? None of the great cathedrals, the greatest landmarks of European culture, would be there in our cities. No churches in our villages. No pubs either, anywhere! No vineyards in Burgundy or Bordeaux. No Tuscan Chianti. No ham or sausages. And none of the great painters. They were all representational. No Mona Lisa, no Botticelli Venus, no Rembrandt, no Van Dyck, no Constable or Turner or Monet. No Picasso! There would have been no Shakespeare because public theatres with mixed audiences would never have been permitted. There would have been no Jane Austen as women would not have been educated and would have had nothing to write about since all their marriages would have been arranged. No women would be visible on our streets  - only figures shrouded in black like bin-bags. And there would have been no science, no inventions like the printing-press, no Isaac Newton or Einstein because all you need to know is written in one short book.
       Yes we certainly owe a lot to King Charles Martel for winning the Battle of Tours.
 We need to put real history back on the school curriculum, and this would be a good start.

Friday, 11 October 2013

Dunce Britain

        It's official  - education in this country has gone right down the tubes. Schools are failing to equip pupils with the basic skills of reading, writing and maths. Britain has come 22nd in the world in a comparative survey carried out by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD). While our education system churns out more and more qualifications, they mean less and less. It's not just my own impression or a vague prejudice  - our young people ARE ignorant and barely literate and cannot compete in the modern world.
        While standards in many parts of the world are rising, here in the UK older people are better educated than the younger generation. Classes are smaller, teachers are far more intensively trained, schools are equipped with wonderfully expensive labs and computers but children learn less and less. Why is this? Maybe the rot set in with the invention of the pocket calculator. After that, nobody thought it was worth learning to do arithmetic themselves.
      Of course Labour abolished the selective system that allowed pupils to develop at a pace that suited them. Grammar schools were scrapped and despite being in power for 18 years the Conservatives never replaced them. Then under the Blair government, education was handed over to those who were obsessed not with excellence, but with social (and anti-social) agendas. Today's kids cannot speak proper English, let alone Latin or French. Most of them never learn a foreign language even up to GCSE level. They study for so-called A-levels that are pure junk. Have you seen the syllabus for A-level English language? It is the worst and most boring rubbish anybody could concoct. Pupils are told to study the gaps and silences in bits of dialogue from Big Brother. I kid you not. They have to make banal comments on how "gender difference" is evinced in text messages from girls and boys. And that gets them into university...
       Our schools are desperately short of good science teachers. The curriculum has been dumbed down and pupils are taught all sorts of outrageous rubbish. Every February they are force-fed the so-called "Gay history month", four weeks of intensive propaganda organized by idiots who know nothing about history. It is an exercise in lunacy. They are taught that that Queen Elizabeth I and Florence Nightingale were lesbians (!).  Ernst Rohm, Hitler's henchman, is held up as a hero and role-model because he was homosexual.
         Ask these same pupils to tell you any other salient facts about Queen Elizabeth I or Ernst Rohm and they are completely confused and ignorant. Our education has been handed over to a pack of dedicated lunatics.
        In the modern world, competition for jobs is wide open and British school-leavers are going to learn some very tough lessons later on if they do not learn something useful fast.

"Young adults in England have scored among the lowest results in the industrialised world in international literacy and numeracy tests.
 A major study by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) shows how England's 16 to 24-year-olds are falling behind their Asian and European counterparts.

England is 22nd for literacy and 21st for numeracy out of 24 countries.

The OECD's Andreas Schleicher warned of a shrinking pool of skilled workers.
 Unlike other developed countries, the study also showed that young people in England are no better at these tests than older people, in the 55 to 65 age range.
 When this is weighted with other factors, such as the socio-economic background of people taking the test, it shows that England is the only country in the survey where results are going backwards - with the older cohort better than the younger.

The study shows that there are 8.5 million adults in England and Northern Ireland with the numeracy levels of a 10-year-old.

"This shocking report shows England has some of the least literate and numerate young adults in the developed world," said Skills Minister Matthew Hancock.
"These are Labour's children, educated under a Labour government and force-fed a diet of dumbing down and low expectations."

Numeracy test 16 to 24-year-olds

Flanders (Belgium)
South Korea
Czech Republic
Slovak Republic
Northern Ireland
United States
Source: OECD Survey of Adult Skills 2013
 Ministers in England have announced a new maths qualification for 16 to 18 year olds as part of a drive to improve numeracy and its requirement that maths should be studied until the age 18 for those who do not have a good GCSE in the subject.
 The newly-appointed shadow education secretary Tristram Hunt defended Labour's record.
 "Labour drove up standards in maths and English across our schools, evident in the huge improvements we saw in GCSE results between 1997 and 2010."
 He said a future Labour government would "ensure all young people study maths and English to 18" and would not allow "unqualified teachers to teach in our classrooms on a permanent basis".
 Young adults in Northern Ireland performed better in the OECD tests than in England, but they were also in the bottom half of these rankings.
 The highest-performing countries among this younger age group were Japan, Finland and the Netherlands. The country with the lowest numeracy skills was the United States, plummeting from once being one of the strongest education systems.
 This landmark study from the OECD set out to measure the level of skills within the adult population - testing actual ability in literacy, numeracy and digital skills, rather than looking at qualifications.
 It involved 166,000 adults taking tests in 24 education systems, representing populations of 724 million people. From the UK, adults in England and Northern Ireland participated.
 The study looked at the level of skills across the adult population, between the ages of 16 and 65. England and Northern Ireland are below average for both literacy and numeracy, in league tables headed by Japan and Finland.
 But for most industrialised countries the younger population are much better at such tests than the older generations.
  Dr Jasper Kim describes South Korea's education system
Mr Schleicher pointed to the examples of Finland and South Korea where there had been huge progress in recent decades.
 A statement from the Finnish embassy highlighted that this was about a long term commitment to improving schools.
 "This demonstrates that there is a longer trend in the Finnish education success, it is not just something that has happened in recent years."
 However, for England, when the results are separated from Northern Ireland, there was a different and unusual pattern, with almost no advance in test results between the 55 to 65-year-olds and those aged 16 to 24.
 This younger group will have many more qualifications, but the test results show that these younger people have no greater ability than those approaching retirement who left schools with much lower qualifications in the 1960s and 1970s.
 The grandchildren are not any better at these core skills than their grandparents.
 Global race
Mr Schleicher says it might suggest evidence of grade inflation and it shows that better qualifications do not necessarily mean better skills.
 "When you look at this snapshot you do have to conclude that these young people are not any better skilled when it comes to those foundation skills than people in the older generation," he said.
 He warned of the serious economic implications of a failure to provide a skilled workforce.
 Andreas Schleicher
Andreas Schleicher has warned that young adults in England are falling behind other countries
The influential OECD expert showed how there was an increasing demand in the jobs market for those with higher skills - and a static or falling jobs market for those with lower skills.
 England and Northern Ireland have particularly high levels of adults with the lowest skill level in literacy and numeracy.
 The economic and social rewards for having high skills are particularly strong in England and Northern Ireland, says the research, with significant advantages in health, job opportunities and income.
 The global economic race is strongly linked to educational performance and the OECD report shows how the UK's share of the highest skilled workers is falling.
 An even sharper decline is faced by the United States, an education superpower of a previous generation. Last year the OECD warned that the US was almost the only developed country facing educational "downward mobility", where the younger population is less well educated than the older generation.
 This latest study shows that the US once had 42% of the world's highest-skilled adults but this had now fallen to 28%.
 Mr Schleicher set out the scale of the difference in ability, saying that many secondary school pupils in Japan were ahead of graduates in England.
 Neil Carberry, the CBI's director for employment and skills, said the UK's economic future depended on improving the skills of the workforce.
 "This survey simply emphasises that the UK cannot afford to stand still on skills."
Ian Brinkley, director at the Work Foundation think tank, said the study showed the UK faced a "relative decline in the economy's skills base".
 "We face a major generational challenge."

Thursday, 10 October 2013


        An article in today's Times magazine is entitled "How did this man [Murad Ahmed] convince Mark Zuckerberg to pay $1 billion for an app that makes no money?
        And according to the Telegraph of 6th October, "Prince Harry has convinced his girlfriend to marry him..." and the article goes on,

"Australia gives a rapturous reception to the Prince as freinds [sic] say his girlfriend is ready to settle down and predict a wedding next year"...

Even the misspelling of the word "friend" does not annoy me so much as the now-ubiquitous misuse of the word "convince" when they mean "persuade."
     I am not surprised when I come across this in the gutter press such as the Mirror or the Guardian, or gossip blogs such as "Celebitchy":-

There used to be such a thing as a quality newspaper, which meant that even though you couldn't believe all the news and knew it had been obtained by bribery, eavesdropping and phone-tapping, you could at rely on it being written by somebody who had passed O-level English language. That alas, is no longer true. The shrinking pool of people in this country who did or could pass such an exam is now smaller than the number of WWII veterans, and dying off at an even faster rate.
          I still fight a lone, almost single-handed battle against the horrific "for free" and painstakingly point out to complete strangers that the present continuous tense of the the verb to sit is "sitting" and that of the verb to stand is "standing"  - not "sat" and "stood". If I had time I would complain to Ofcom whenever I hear someone say on TV or radio  "I am sat at home right now", or "She is sat in an armchair..." or "They are stood over there on the other side of the road..."   If we had spot fines for this sort of horrendous deformity of language, it might help to pay off our deficit or reduce the National Debt.
       There is growing hostility to the idea of correctness. The BBC fosters a quasi-East-enders mode of speech as the norm. The term "grammar Nazi" implies that if you believe in clarity of expression you are guilty of genocide. Publishers no longer bother to weed out grammatical or lexical errors. The copy writers who work for supposedly upmarket publishing houses no longer have the education to do this. Let me say once and for all that you PERSUADE somebody to do something, but you CONVINCE them of an idea, or a belief. If Prince Harry wishes to PERSUADE his girlfriend to marry him (an act) he needs to CONVINCE her that they are compatible in the long term (a belief) and that life in the royal family would be bearable (another belief).
    The confusion arises because if you convince them of an idea, it may change their behaviour. But the distinction remains. I suppose I should mind much more about the fact that in the same Times magazine, a restaurant reviewer called Giles Coren tells us that Burgundy is in the "South-West" of France. But I don't. Geographical dyslexia doesn't really bother me.
     The curious thing is that Jane Austen, who had very little school education, and taught herself by reading, understood the difference between "convince" and "persuade" perfectly well. Otherwise, she might have called her last completed novel "Conviction".

Thursday, 3 October 2013

Sad, Horrendously, Horribly Sad

Somebody posted this story on an internet forum under the impression that it is FUNNY. That depends on your point of view. I think it is appallingly sad, and a sign of how morally bankrupt we have become.
The man who tells the story has nothing but contempt for the woman he slept with, and for women in general. He regards her as a tart to be exploited, and regards commitment or marriage as nothing but a "trap". He gleefully exposes how she was unfaithful and lied to him,because he thinks it justifies his selfish behaviour. He seems to take a vindictive pleasure in reducing her to sobs. How gruesome that people who hate and despise each other are still having any physical contact. This mutual hatred and distrust is the outcome of "permissiveness". It should make any decent person shudder...


Vasectomy: $400. Speechless look on her face: priceless.
I'll try to sum up a funny story that happened a few years ago:

I got a vasectomy...

I met a woman soon afterwards. She was nice and attractive but with a selfish streak that raised a big red flag. She was 32 at the time and I could practically HEAR her biological clock ticking. Regardless, she was a good lay, easy on the eyes, and reasonably good company.
I did NOT tell her about my vasectomy and I always used a condom with her to protect against STDs. She assumed, obviously, that the condom was only used for birth control. Silly girl.
We date for a few months. I never made any move towards commitment but she brought it up occasionally. For me, this was a casual but pleasant relationship. For her - as I was to find out - it was part of life-changing series of events that she was planning very carefully.

Four months into dating, I get the, "I'm pregnant" talk. She's going on and on about how the condom must have broken and now we really need to think about getting married "for the baby". She's positively giddy. She has a baby in her and she thinks she's gonna have a good meal ticket (me) to go along with her new 7lb annuity.
At this point, I'm just as giddy. I get to pull the reverse "oops!" on her. I figured that she slept with some bad boy and got knocked up. Good thing I was using condoms. Better still that I have a serious mistrust of women who can't think beyond their own uteri.
So I wait a couple of days to "think about all this." I meet her again. I say I don't want kids and that she should have an abortion. I know where this is going and sure enough it goes there. She goes completely batshit insane on me. There were the usual insults about my manhood. There were threats of legal action. It was all very ugly and I was loving every minute of it.

Well, I let her stew for a few days. She leaves me nasty messages on my phone. She sends awful emails. I'm laughing hysterically.
It was time to drop the hammer. While she was stewing I was busy. First I get a notarized copy from the urologist who performed the vasectomy. Next I get a notarized copy of the TWO test results indicating a "negative test result for sperm" to show I'm sterile and shooting blanks. Finally, I get a letter from a shark attorney stating he has seen the other documents and is prepared to litigate against this woman if she continues to communicate with me in such an unpleasant manner. Also, the letter states that we will insist on DNA testing to show that the baby is not mine. I'm ready.
I meet with this woman at her place. I bring flowers and a small bit of jewelry to show I am willing to reconcile and assume my responsibilities as a new father. I also have stuck in my pocket the documents I have prepared.
She's all giddy again. Her plan is going perfectly - or so she thinks. We talk about our future. We have some pretty good sex. Then, as I am about to walk out the door, I ask her the $64,000 question. "Are you sure that this baby is mine?"
Well, she goes batshit insane again. Hell, she ought to. Her plan could completely unravel if there is ANY question about my paternity. Oh, she's really screaming now. How dare I question her morals! Do I really think she's a slut? I'm just trying to weasel out of my responsibilities... blah, blah, blah, yadda, yadda, yadda.
I'm not really mad. I'm kind of embarrassed for her. But since she won't shut up and the neighbors can hear all of this, I ask her to step back inside and sit down. She sits on the sofa and calms down a bit. She is glaring at me with all the moral self-righteousness that only a woman can muster up. She thinks she has me trapped. She is 100% convinced her plan has worked. Oh, the tangled web of lies and deceit she has wrought around herself and I am about to hack through them with a few pieces of paper.
I reach into my pocket slowly. I extract the three pieces of paper and unfold them slowly and deliberately.
I tell her simply, "You're screwed".
Her look doesn't change. There is no way she can fathom what I have prepared.
I continue: "I am sterile."
Her look changes just a bit. Something is beginning to sink in. Naturally, she reverts to women's logic. "You're full of shit! You're trapped and you know it!"
I hold up the letter and the test results. "Three months before we met, I had a vasectomy. Here is a notarized letter from him stating what I had done. Here are two test results showing that I tested negative for the presence of sperm. Blanks. I am shooting blanks. That baby inside you is simply not mine."
This woman is not to be swayed by logic and clear documentation. "Bullshit, those are fakes!" She screams.
I was ready for that. "No, they are real. This last piece of paper is from my attorney. It's a simple letter to you that states if you pursue any kind of legal action against me for child support that I will insist on a DNA test to prove paternity, that is, to prove that your baby is not mine."
I give the woman all the documents. She reads them slowly, deliberately. With each passing second she can feel in her soul that she has made a very bad mistake. With denial swept away, she started to cry. It's a small cry at first. Then it becomes deeper and more painful. By the time she gets to the letter from the lawyer she is sobbing.
I had no sympathy for her. I turned and walked out the door. Even after I closed the door I could still hear her sobbing.

Epilogue -
I never heard directly from this woman again. I did hear through my friends that she did indeed have the baby. I also heard that the real father was some guy in a band she had met. I assumed that after 30, women stopped going after musicians, bikers, criminals, and thugs. Silly me for thinking the best of American women....

The Moral of the Story:  Get a vasectomy, but keep it a secret.